Laughing through a pandemic... at a distance

Another Halloween is done.  Now I just have a bunch of plastic and latex haunt toys strewn around the gardens and roof that my neighbors would like to see put away.  I can appreciate that.  

In 2021, please come visit us to celebrate a re-opening of sorts.  I plan to get fairly overkill with the display.  Let's see if the weather or next pseudo-apocalypse foils my plans.

Can't stop. Won't stop.

 

The old and rapidly dying mulberry tree having one last year with some hangers-on. 

 

Just hanging out in the garden

 

 2020 brought back some of the AtmosFX classic video projections

Zombie Invasion inside, Bloody Walls outside.

 A Halloween without Trick-or-Treaters

El Paso experienced a surge in Covid-19 infections after months of people getting relaxed about precautions.  That led to the El Paso Dept of Health issuing a T-O-T ban (that I disagreed with).  The mayor promoted this.  Soon after, hospitalizations increased, leading to some on the City Council to call for a return to non-essential lockdowns.  The mayor, facing reelection, opposed this.  Apparently, people can spread Covid during Trick-or-Treating, but not in restaurants and stores.  When Halloween night came around, people were understandably absent.  This is a good thing.  It is sad that kids missed out this year, but Halloween will return for another try next year.  

But wait, there's more.  Despite having no visitors, we still get a decent amount of cars that pass by.  The Kerbey House still had an audience!  Halloween could still be celebrated, if only from the safe distance of a slowly passing car.  The pictures you see are what awaited anyone in the street.

We will be back.  And unless things go horribly wrong in 2021, we will have a walkthrough haunted patio and Trick-or-Treating again.  

 The rose garden has a problem

The ghouls have been pushed away from the house and have taken up residence in the rose garden, attempting to taunt passing drivers.  I do not suggest for anyone to attempt to engage with them, as the rose bushes also tend to bite.  There has been much swearing and bleeding today.  

Again, there will be NO CANDY this year.  Covid-19 took that away.  However, the ghouls will remain in the garden to help to keep the spirit of Halloween alive.  El Paso will get through this.

 The Kerbey House 2020, ver. 4

January 2020:  This year's haunt will be epic, with clowns and werewolves, and massive spiders, and (simulated) fire, and lasers!

March 2020:  We can still do the walkthrough haunt, but maybe try to space out the line of visitors.

June 2020:  Maybe a patio walkthough is a bad idea.  I can still aim for epic in the gardens.

August 2020:  New yardhaunt theme!  Plants Vs. Zombies!  Trick-or-Treating lives!

Early October EP Dept of Health advisory "ban" announced.  I am annoyed.

EP infection numbers increase further.  

EP hospitals are filling up.  Bonus: a nearby zip code is one of the worst hit areas.

Late October 2020:  Forget about handing out candy for real.  Also, reduce the near-house display to not attract hopeful candy-seekers.

Halloween must live on!  Light up the house, decorate the roof and front rose garden jungle to give passing cars a show.  

At this point, this is the best case, more responsible thing that a home haunter can do this year.  It is not yet a total loss.  Things could be worse.  

Wear your masks, eat candy, watch horror movies, and maybe drive around to find and admire those few houses that are still celebrating.  

If you drive near The Kerbey House, feel free to briefly jump out to take pics and give us a wave.

 Although this Halloween will be subdued compared to past years, the spirit will live on.

See more of the artist's work at https://casperspell.wordpress.com/

 Zombie Jerky

 Our El Paso desert climate should be a good place to wait out any future zombie horde apocalypse.  Stock up on bottled water beforehand.  

One of our zombie maidens enjoying the rose garden. 

 If you sing on Halloween night, she might dance for you.  

Letting on of my first year's corpse props back into this year's show

He can be found lurking under the olive tree

 

 The Kerbey spiders claiming another victim

A challenge will be on how to light it at night, or risk it disappearing into the darkness of the garden.

 Hug-A-Tree, El Paso Halloween edition

 The first of the infected has taken its position in the garden.

Halloween will go live from 5:00p to 9:30p, with T-O-T occurring until we run out of candy.

The Kerbey House in El Paso, Texas

Getting the extended family excited for their show in a few weeks.

Candy hours are from 5 p.m. to 9 p.m.

The displays are vest viewed after dark

 Trick-or-Treat candy  ✅

Haunt Display with animated props, lighting, and sound ✅

Wearing PPE and providing hand sanitizer ✅

Scenes set up to promote taking selfies ✅

Walkthrough haunted house ⛔ (postponed until 2021)

 The Infected Rise Again!

2020 has already given us in El Paso so much to worry about. October has arrived, and it appears that the massive spiders have returned, and the bloodthirsty hordes of a past plague (2015) have stumbled into the gardens again, bringing new friends along with them.  

Bonus: one of them has been playing with matches. 🔥

A few are still contained in the garage.  They will be released on Halloween night.  PPE masks have been provided for them.  Unfortunately, none seem willing to wear them correctly, defeating the purpose.  Try to keep at least 6 feet away to minimize contamination risk.  

To further reduce infection transmission, the will be no walkthrough haunted house / haunted patio this year.  But please try to visit us and take you picture with some of the mob lurking in the gardens.

The Kerbey House Presents 

"The Wicked Garden, 2019"

 

Witches and Scarecrows take over for Halloween.

The El Paso news media said that a great freeze would arrive, and that Halloween may be ruined.  And people should stay home.  Or at lease dress like a blizzard was coming.  The media, as usual, overstated things.

Because of this, we had maybe 1,500 visitors, which was a reduction from the previous 3 years.  However, we also had a walkthrough haunt location and structure that proved to be immune from the winds that destroyed the haunt the prior year. Its walls will be reusable for the return of the walkthrough planned for 2021.  

TKH 2019 Wicked Garden (direct link)

 A Short Compilation of the 2017 TKH Haunt

Running just under 1.5 minutes.  Give it a quick look.  💀

2017 TKH short (direct link)

 KVIA broadcast from The Kerbey House 

We have been fortunate to have reporter Julio Cesar Chavez from KVIA visit our home haunt in both 2017 and 2019 to conduct live broadcasts and haunt visitor interviews.  Both times, the crowds have welcomed the attention.  From these visits, I have learned that almost everyone drowns in awkwardness, myself included, when presented with a microphone.  So I appreciate the skill that goes into being a local reporter trying to put together a 20-60 second piece for broadcast. 

I have a few pictures from the 2019 visit.  Unfortunately, I was not able to get a copy of the video that was aired on Halloween night.  You will have to settle for my under-lit amateur videos I posted to YouTube.

Faces of Halloween 2019

 

 El Paso Halloween is not canceled!

There is not a real ban on Trick-or-Treating.

There is not a real ban on Halloween parties.

There will be no fines or citations.

Wear a protective PPE face mask with your costume.

The City of El Paso is "strongly recommending" that people stay home on Halloween to reduce Covid19 risks.   

All of this was confirmed with a call to the El Paso mayor's office.  There is no enforcement associated with the announcement of a ban.  The virus is real, it should be take seriously, and all should wear PPE in public, but Halloween is no more risky than going to a store.  Any proposed ban is fearmongering.

The local media is spreading clickbait about a toothless ban that the city officials announced, with the part about it really being a recommendation being buried in the details.

Every few years, there are attempts by the media and some politicians to scare people and ruin Halloween. This is the 2020 version.

The Kerbey House home haunt will be operational, with candy and scares at the ready.  

However, due to Covid19, we will postpone the haunted walthrough / patio haunt plans until 2021, when hopefully the worst has passed and things are closer to normal again.

Wear a mask.  Wash your hands.  Enjoy Halloween.

Here are a few daytime pics from Halloween-eve of the 2018 TKH display.

Singing pumpkins test run, 2018

This is a scene that I will bring back (in a another location) for the 2019 show.

More props were added for show night to add more texture to the scene, with many visitors confused as to where the projection was coming from.

2016 pre-Haunt Season Begins... sort of

SOooo many ideas... so many plans.... too many props,

yet I still want more.

The haunt season is starting to warm up, and the outside temperature is trying to kill us.  I am seeing prop-builds on FB pages that are making me both envious and aware that I need to get off of my ass and start building.  However, most of those haunt friends and fans don't live in the desert with 103f afternoons and very few clouds in the sky.  The mornings are possible for a few hours, but employment and walking the four-legged kids usually gets in the way.

The Plan So Far:

Warning:  The plan may change based on the wild ideas that seem to pop in my head as to how I should do the display... usually when I am travelling to work and am half asleep.  Nothing is certain.

NO GARAGE WALKTHROUGH AGAIN THIS YEAR

The wife has asked nicely, so the haunt will be a front yard display with me occasionally donning a mask and creeping out TOT guests.  Hopefully I can win this negotiation next year.

NO HALLOWEEN AFTERPARTY

I am happily married, but regretfully chose Halloween as my wedding night; meaning an anniversary dinner out is in order.  Again... Hopefully I can win this negotiation next year.

YES, THE GLOVES ARE OFF AGAIN

Since I don't get my garage haunt, I do get to put my more scary and nasty things on display in the front for all to see.

I HAVE LEARNED THAT ZOMBIES AREN'T SCARY

It turns out that too many people watch The Walking Dead and are desensitized to zombie props.  They apparently let their 6yr old children watch the show too. 

So going forward...

THEY AREN'T ZOMBIES, THEY AREN'T THE INFECTED...  THEY ARE CORPSES

nasty corpses that will litter my cars

THE CEMETERY WILL BE SMALLER AND RELOCATED

Out October winds play havoc with the foam headstones.  Every year is a battle.  I have decided that their prime location in the wide center island will be given up to a better and less windsail-like display, and instead go in a corner area (previously not used) where electrical outlets are plenty and animated props will be safer from growing legs or getting damaged... I think.

EVERYONE LOVES / HATES EVIL CLOWNS

The cholo clowns getting ready for a drive-by in the Buick was a HUUUUuuuge success last year.  This has earned them a bigger stage, being the wide center island.  The will leave the car and become groundbreakers amongst the lawn and rose bushes.  Lighting will be run to them and hopefully a few lesser animated props will be able to be set up as to be effective while also set where they can be monitored easily.  Many new faces have joined the family for this year.

THE BUICK IS AN EXCELLENT STAGE

The Buick will have its riders again for all to take pictures with.  Lighting is still a challenge... as I am unsure what colors or style to go with.  A Jeep Wrangler will join in to act with the Buick as bookend of sorts to the front of the new cemetery scene.  They will be filled with corpses that for now are dead-dead.  I may decide that they are demon-possessed undead corpses at most

LA LLORONA WILL BE IN ATTENDANCE

I promised her a cool tomb with fancy effects last year, and then procrastinated most of the time away.  It will get completed this year and should get a lot of attention in the new cemetery.

PENNY, MEET MIRANDA

Do you like creepy-ass dead children?  Miranda will also be in this reduced cemetery with fog and projections and things popping up and maybe a few more fun things if I think of any.

BUT WAIT.... THERE'S MORE!!!

I will post more later.  Hopefully soon.  Maybe today.  Trust me.  It isn't like this is the first time I have posted since last December.

The Heroes of the 2015 Halloween Display

  

  

The Kerbey House was without its full walkthrough this year due to time constraints and the expectation of huge crowds of Trick-or-Treaters (TOTs) on this Saturday Halloween.  The crowds were near non-stop in 2014, and it was difficult to manage both the TOTs and managing the walkthrough.  That turned out to be a good plan, as we likely had over 1,800 TOTs this year.  This change also meant that my friends pictured above were freed from being hidden in the haunt and were instead set up in a few scenes in the front yard.  The graveyard did not happen, as I procrastinated too long.  However, the Buick loaded with my "Rollin' Crypts" clown gang turned out to be the most popular of all of the scenes.  It was lit from within and above by spinning DJ lights and low-powered strobes.  It ended up being a backdrop for many pics that night.  As a bonus, there was room in the backseat for me to get some haunt acting scares in on a few victims that dropped their guard nearby. 

I will update this with a short video and more pics of this scene at night soon.

Everyone Loves Babies & Clowns

 It is dangerous to linger around haunt prop seller sites this time of year.  All sorts of props seem to get rationalized and purchased at 2am.  With that in mind, I present to you my first foray into the evil possessed baby category. 

 

 

He is a crude puppet that is meant to be held like a real baby before attacking a guest.  Unfortunately, nothing moves, other than to turn one's hand and the puppet's cloth body allows the head to sort of turn.  While I may use it as a hand puppet on Halloween night a few times... it will likely spend more time as a static prop in the cemetery.  Overall, not a bad purchase. 

 

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I am a sucker for a good smile.  And while my wife would contend that I have more than enough evil clown masks to be used as static props (she is not a fan), I believe there is always room for one more in the scene.  I think the kids will really appreciate this one. 

 

 

2015: The Year of the Walkthrough Display

Age protections will not be in effect.  Everyone gets it this year.

 

 

 

I have done a modest display one year, a haphazard (emphasis on hazard) interactive display another year, and a full garage and yard walkthrough with a front graveyard during the last two years.  I am expecting even larger crowds this year.  With that in mind, I will forego the full garage walkthrough, and instead use my large circular (oblong?) front driveway as a two sided, wide walkthrough for the family hordes.  Few punches will be pulled.  Props that were relegated to last year's walkthrough to protect the youngest TOTs will be on display and possibly active in the front where all must pass through.  If kids and sensitive parents get damaged... they can just get over it later.  Actors will be roaming, when not doing the TOT assist.  Lighting and animated props will be in effect.  If all goes well... shit will get real.  The biggest challenges are the everpresent late October winds savaging my foam-based graveyard and hanging props... and my procrastination in getting those foam-based props ready in time for the show.

 

2015:  No Theme.... Four Scenes!

 

Although last year had a theme, and next year will too, the masses will have to forgive the lack of one this year.  I doubt that most will notice.   There should be so much going on visually, that there should be no time to really think about it. 

 

The Scenes:

 

1)  El Paso Driving Tour Station

(Ticket booth, Huge Buick filled with evil clowns, lots of effects)

 

2)  Grim Road Cemetery

(updated gravestones and tombs, con La Llorona)

 

3)  Zombie Cage

(people love zombies and I have many.. so why not)

 

4)  Spider Alley

(mostly a roof-mounted projection with lots of props)

 

 

I hope to have a few masks and costumes ready to change into every hour to be able to scare those TOTs that are doing laps around the neighborhood.  If all goes well, others will join in to help with the display / cue line acting.  I am expecting easily 1,500 TOTs.  I haven't decided if the media will be invited to grab a 10 second spot to air later that night.  We will keep it running until around 9pm, weather permitting. 

The September Stall-out

Progress has been halted due to technical difficulties...

 

 

Mid-September, and prop progress has stalled-out... as expected.  This is the time of year when all of those plans run up against the harsh reality that it is still too hot to be leaning over a foam sheet, inhaling its' dust while trying to do necessary engraving on headstones, etc...

 

However, the impulse prop purchasing has been going and a financially debilitating pace, so that finding a place for it all will be a challenge... and explaining the credit card balance to one's spouse will be awkward.

 

Hopefully, I will have some pics to share soon.  My orders should start trickling in this week.  Masks, wall props, puppets (they were on sale... don't judge me), and other stuff.

 

Now, I just need to figure out how to make a dozen crude but effective standing body forms to mount zombie masks on.  Also, time management and project completion.... I should probably make some attempt at that.

 

Stay creepy.

Babysitter Wanted

I get ideas for my haunt by watching a lot of horror movies.  Most are not good (Netflix)... but the few that keep my attention deserve a mention. So the following review will hopefully be the first of many posted here throughout the year.

 

TLDR:  An interesting 80s style horror movie with good acting (except the boy... but that is to be expected), thankfully non-80s dialogue, and the right dose of gore... so that one cringes during the action scenes without getting desensitized.  It does do things that most horror fans will expect, but it stayed interesting enough to have me return to it after being interrupted a few times during the viewing.  Should have replay value even after knowing all of the twists.  4.5 of 5

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A slightly longer review:  This movie plays on the fear of being new and mostly friendless, of being trapped far from help, of creepy priests, and the fear of being passed through the digestive tract of a child.  And while most horror fans will see the many twists' headlights coming around each corner a few minutes before each reveal, it doesn't hurt the film.  Horror doesn't lose point for being derivative.  It loses points for being boring.  Fortunately, this film wasn't boring.  And it didn't have to rely on senseless gore and nudity to achieve that.  The gore we see hurts.  Most viewers will likely cringe in a few parts, but it serves the story...so it is not merely gore-porn.  The dialogue is to the point too, with only one section full of a boasting villain engaging in some exposition.  But the acting is good, so that can be forgiven.  All of the adults have fun with their roles.  The child actor... not so much.

 



That kid seemed to have been given a 1 minute compilation video of the child from the original The Shining as inspiration... and then just kept replaying the REDRUM part in between takes.   But horror fans are likely used to seeing a few stiff performances by child actors without ruining the movie.  I will put the blame on his coach.  Kids are plenty creepy to me in real life.  It is when they are told to be creepy that they seem to then just go stiff and dull.  If the twist ending had been that he was an interstellar alien in a human skin that had recently landed on Earth, I would have said the kid nailed the role.

The big question.... will you be scared?  Likely not.  But you will be curious to see where the ride is going and to see if the heroine survives.  One never can tell in horror.  And if you let yourself, you will be tense in a few parts and will cringe during the big fight scene.  The concept is scary, with acting performances that serve the script well.  And since the movie does so many things right for the genre, you will forgive the very few holes... such as how does one help another walk while having a deep axe wound in their own back (???).  Or who the hell called the cops?  But this is horror... not a history documentary.  So us horror fans are used to this too.  I definitely suggest this movie to fans of 80s horror.  And I suspect that I will see most of these actors in other projects. 

The pet peeve that made me swear at the screen that will be the slightest of SPOILERS is the obsession in horror films with setting up a sequel.  Why can't a horror movie just end?  Why must there almost always be a wink, or a hand reach out, or a "we can't find the body" ending?  Is there really a need for a Babysitter Wanted 2?  How about, "that was intense and jacked up, but it is over now.  Good luck with having a normal life and here is a card for a local PTSD counselor." [end rant]

While I do not think that any big parts of this movie will find its way into my haunt (maybe some of the gore barn setting as inspiration), I do not regret watching it.  That cannot be said of  >50%  of what I see in the horror section of Netflix.  I legitimately liked it.  Hopefully, this movie will get picked up by Netflix to improve its stable.  In the meantime, give the movie a chance and spend the $3 on Vimeo. 

 

https://vimeo.com/ondemand/38763/128208085

 

 

 

Overall rating:  4.5 of 5

The Clown Run, 2014

I never seem to take enough pictures on show night.  :/  And on a related note, I think I need to invest in a better night cam for 2016. 

 

Nonetheless...  here is one of the surviving action pics from the Clown Run that was the last stage of 2014 walkthrough.  It was set in the sideyard that runs the length of the house (70ft?) and is roughly 9 feet wide, with too many things planted on most parts of the sides.  Static props filled the area while spinning lights were used to "animate" them and possibly disorient the guests.  A haunt acter was stationed at the end as a jump scare.

 

 

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The guests left the small back yard, turning a tight corner to then be met by my gatekeeper.  He was illuminated by a strobe at the front and was backlit by the spillover from the spinning colorful DJ lights.  Guests could see some silhouettes of props beyond this, but were immediately met by waist high masked clown props as they passed through the fabric.

 

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They killed him.  At the beginning, this guy was suspended on the rope ladder and partially obscuring a masked prop a few feet behind.  Why didn't I take his pic before or during that night.... or even reset just for a good pic?  Good question.  Also a good learning lesson.

 

 

Here is some of what was waiting just beyond the rope ladder clown.  It looks much more benign in sunlight.  The bordering gardens served to visually soften the path while providing random tough scares to guests as they brushed past the standing masked props that were simple wooden stakes with clothes hangers, some masks, and the uglier of the shirts from my tropical shirt phase (2003-2006) that still lurks in my clothes closet.

 

 

 

This should give a better idea of the path structure and how close the guests had to pass the various masked props that looked very much possibly alive when lit by the DJ lights.

 

 

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Again... the big learning lessons are that moving DJ lights (not just annoying strobes) do a lot to bring simple props to life, forcing guests to SLOW DOWN and appreciate some of the haunt that they might otherwise speedwalk right past.  And always take many pictures during the build and especially during the show night.  Blurry is better than nothing.

 

 

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The 2014 Clown Run will be the last for this side yard.

 

Although this Clown Run was much more successful than the 2013 Ghoul Run (very poor lighting and people just walked through it missing most details)... with a big difference being that the walkthrough direction was flipped for 2014, making the side yard the ending rather than the beginning, my gardening hobby has made it near impossible.  That neat mulch path is now littered with stepping stones and other plants. 

 

 

Soooo... for 2015, the side yard will, at most, hold a large front-facing prop very near the front yard (since there will be no immersive walkthrough in the back).   This side yard will then be limited to being a lengthy display of the same (and additional) evil clowns to serve as a distraction while guests enter the adjacent alley that leads to/from the garage-yard haunt in the back.  This will allow my plants to live while also permitting me to set up a wilder display without the worry of things getting trampled like the rope ladder clown was and this poor guy: